20170701

Thanks for nothing, intellection.

We had to take the Strengths Finder assessment at work and these were my top 5 strengths:

1. Intellection
2. Input
3. Learner
4. Strategic
5. Responsibility

Everyone with intellection knows that's not a word, so let me translate for you:

1. You're a nerd
2. You're a nerd
3. You're a nerd
4. You lied when you took the test
5. You should have more fun

The first three are no surprise. But strategic? I don't know... when I think of strategic, I think of people who are good at chess. People who can see what's going to happen next if they take or don't take a certain action. Here is my case for how not strategic I am:

Example 1) Fifty percent of the time I put my ukulele back in its case, I put it in upside-down.

Big side with big side, no?
 At one point I actually asked myself why they put the zipper on the bottom.

The other fifty percent of the time, I preempt my stupidity (is this the strategic part??) and purposely put it in the opposite way of my natural inclination. But wait... little end into big end?

This can't possibly be right.
How did I manage to get it wrong again? I strategically preempted my stupidity! I turn it around so that big sides match -- ah, now it's looking right -- and end up with this:

I don't understand why it won't go in farther.
Damn it... foiled again! So then I turn it around again in this chaotic universe and finally get the thing in there, contrary to basic logic. Strategic? Folks, it takes me three tries to get a ukulele-shaped ukulele into a ukulele-shaped ukulele case. A toddler could match shapes better than me!

One could argue that my strategy is just neutralized by my lack of spatial reasoning skills, except...

Example 2) Fifty percent of the time I try to bring up a Snapchat filter, I first touch my real face, not my face on the screen. And I am younger than 80, so there's no excuse for this techtarded behavior. Strategic? I think not. And where was intellection during all this??

4 comments:

  1. Intellection - I had to look it up, but it is indeed in the dictionary. I've learned something new - thanks.

    What is reason? Who makes these decisions? Me? Most of the time - yes.

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    Replies
    1. Oh, really? It's not in my dictionary, but then I still use the ancient paper kind.

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    2. I only use dictionaries that I can view without electricity or batteries.

      The American Heritage Dictionary of the English Language - Third Edition 1996, 1992 Houghton Mifflin Company (2080 pages)

      "Middle English intelleccioun, understanding, from Latin intellectio ... intellect."

      I'm curious if I can find an older dictionary with the entry.

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    3. Oh, interesting. I was using The Merriam-Webster Dictionary (1997). Either way I still can't figure out my ukulele :\

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